We all have them. That flash of insight that makes you go “Ah ha!” well I had one yesterday.
“Well? What was it?”
I’m getting to it.
It was an odd one – I’ve been dealing with a lot of old patterning and beliefs stemming back to my teenage years – letting them go, clearing them and forgiving them.
This one kind of crept up on me. I was doing an oracle card reading for someone and has a flash of realisation that I’ve been hiding from my full potential doing these readings. I know that sounds all a little too cryptic doesn’t it.
“Just a tad”
So some background – in my late teens I was given a tarot deck – nothing fancy just a simple tarot deck and guidebook. I started to work with it and after a bit of time offered to try a few readings for my friends.
They started getting accurate…..very accurate. I’ll be honest I scared the bejesus out of myself and put them away never to be worked with again.
Hindsight is 20:20 vision
In hindsight I realise now I wasn’t in the space I am now to be able too understand what I was picking up on. So it put me off.
Fast forward quite a few years later and I was gifted an angel oracle deck – I had, obviously, some negative connotations around the word Tarot – so Oracle felt safer to someone really just starting out.
I found that I enjoyed working with them but only used them for myself – and after a few years for some other very close friends. You know the usual, drawing the cards and looking up in the book what it meant 🙂 nothing wrong with that, we all learn somehow.
Fast forwards a few more years and my collection of decks was a tad higher *ahem up in the 20’s* I was a bit more confident and decided on a whim I’d pop up a reading on my FB page.
“Sounds relatively straight forwards”
Yes, it may read like the in black and white but it took a MASSIVE amount of trust to do that. So many other people I knew and followed on FB did incredible readings and I felt a little out of my depth but I felt the fear and did it anyway.
“But you say don’t compare yourself to others”
I know – but this is simply to show you I’m still human and still get the wobbles and that’s ok.
So I did occasional readings or card pulls till I started to build up more confidence to keep doing them weekly. When I look back at the original ones I started with I see how far things have progressed but I’m jumping ahead of myself again.
So for a good 6-8 months I was doing my weekly readings – enjoying them , getting practice. And then I got asked if I could do a reading for another person. Eeeeeep!!!! Oh my god – someone wants me to read for them and pay me to do it???! PANIC, PANIC, PANIC…grab the brown paper bag she’s going to pass out!!!!!!!
I know it seems a bit funny now but at the time I just about sh*t myself – honestly!
Leap of faith
So I did it. And you know what? It went just fine. As of course it was always going to – I had no faith in myself.
Those of you who know my FB page know I do a weekly reading every Sunday and have done for what feels like ages – but I’ve noticed a step change in them. They aren’t light and fluffy – they can go in a very different direction to others that go up on the same day or they can almost echo the same sentiment. They are becoming more in depth – and I’m working with them intuitively. I’m sensing what comes through direct and not relying on the guidebooks.
My decks change every 6 month or so as my vibration changes. Which is perfect otherwise the energy would stagnate. So as soon as a deck hasn’t been worked with for a while I release it.
“So this “Ah ha!” moment you spoke of ????”
Yes – I realised that I have been self limiting myself HUGELY on my card readings I do for others.
I play it down, a lot.
I don’t advertise them as I assume there are others out there who can do much better than myself
And I caught myself at it yesterday – wait a minute! Seriously what was I doing?
I was listening to my teenage self without really knowing it. Bless her. Letting her fear take over and keep things suppressed.
I am just a channel for my team – truly.
These cards are simply another form of communication with them that I can translate in a visual manner – I’m a visual learner always have been. So I can interpret what I see and the patterns that come forwards. Or the words that flow when I type up the reading – trust me what I go to say and what I type can be veeeeeeeeery different.
Sometimes when I read them back I can’t believe I was quite that eloquent ….until I twig it wasn’t me. I’m at peace with that – I’m laughing as I type this thats’s how at peace with it I honestly am.
Now to be very precise I don’t work with Spirit – that’s a conscious choice I made several years ago.
I’m not a psychic medium nor do I have any pull towards that type of work.
What comes through in the readings is a direct link with Source via my team/higher self as a filtration system of sorts. Or a go-between.
“So this teenage self thing….”
We had a chat.
I told her it was ok to let go of the fear as it’s ok.
I have more understanding now than I did then and my discernment works in such a way its ok.
She let go 🙂
“So what happens now?”
We go with the flow and see where it ends up.
I’m being more open now that this is a form of work that I do and am HAPPY to do for others. It’s all about interpretation and thats why it’s by email only for now. I like to sense check I’m getting the right message before I pass them across.
So if you haven’t seen them please by all means have a look at my FB page for some examples and see if they resonate, or have a look here and see if anything feels right.
No. More. Hiding.